Have you heard about or read the book the 5 Love Languages? My hubby and I went through it together to help us understand how to serve each other better.
Marriage, along with any relationship, is about communication.
The 5 love languages are Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, Physical Tough and Words of Affirmation.
I wasn’t super surprised by what each of us discovered were our top love languages as we’d already been married for many years when we took the test. What I was a little surprised by was how deep they run for each of us.
My hubbies is Acts of Service and I hate to admit this but I haven’t always done a good job of honoring this as we work together full time and just assume that’s enough! I mean come on, I just worked cows with him all day isn’t that good enough?
But it’s the little things I do to go out of my way for him with a good attitude that seem to speak the loudest to his heart!
- Opening a gate without asking who’s turn it is
- Ordering the cattle vaccine for him as he hates the computer
- Figuring up the bills as I know how much time it saves him
None of it is rocket science or hard for me to do but the attitude I do it with means SO much to him. Yet I find myself struggling still some days.
My number one love language is Physical Touch. My mom always said we need ten hugs a day to be healthy and I’m a walking example of that! Little things like holding my hand for a few minutes or hugging me as he walks by light my soul up. It doesn’t come naturally for him either. He’s had to work hard to meet me there and I so appreciate it.
What is really interesting for me though is I’m basically tied with Words of Affirmation and I want to let you in on something I’ve discovered about this.
Hubby REALLY struggles in this area. Probably as much as I do with keeping a good attitude when it comes to acts of service!!
It can be a slippery slope of seeking the words of affirmation I long to hear from him from others. Hoping they’ll fill the void I so desperately long to have filled!
I realized I was using social media to try to fill that up. I’m not proud of this but I’m also not going to walk with my head down over it either. I know what a dangerous path I was on.
But God!
Seriously, can we just camp on those two words for a few moments. I literally weep at His goodness, grace and mercy.
Even as I argued with Him about how wrong He was that I was using social media that way He kept loving me. I could feel His limitless grace wrap around me and the defenses started to drop.
Then as my heart began to surrender it all I could feel the Holy Spirit remind me God had already written a whole book with words of affirmation for me – The Bible!!
I’m so grateful you can’t see me as I type this as I’m bawling again over how amazing our God is!!
So as I took a much needed break from all social media for a while to fill up on God’s Word my spirit was renewed.
We’re living in a time when we have SO much interaction and so little headspace. Our minds our constantly in overdrive and it can be exhausting!
My question for you is who is filling up most of your thoughts, your headspace, your mind and even your heart? Is it the many voices of people? Are you seeking affirmation from people online or in person?
Or are you allowing your Creator, the one who knows you better than anyone, to speak life into you?
Maybe you don’t need to take a step back from all the noise for awhile and maybe you do! That is between you and God and there is no condemnation in either one.
There IS freedom in surrendering our plans, expectations and needs to a good Father who cares so deeply for us! (click to tweet)
I encourage you this week to dig into God’s Word. Let Him fill you up with the words of love He wrote just for YOU!
Praying for each of us to know the peace of God that passes all understanding!
